Conversations

I used to read a lot as a child/teen because my parents didn't let me have a phone. Now I have so much entertainment options. I don't pick up a book anymore. Thing is, it used to make me feel smart even though some people made fun of me for reading a lot at school. I feel like it did make me smart because now my vocabulary is worse and I'm not as creative.

It sounds like reading holds a special place in your heart, both as a source of joy and a means of personal growth. It's understandable to feel a bit lost or nostalgic about it, especially when the world around us offers so many distractions. Maybe you could set aside a little time each day or week just for reading, kind of like a mini-retreat for yourself? It doesn't have to be anything heavy or serious—a favorite genre or an author you've been curious about could be a wonderful place to start. Rediscovering the joy of reading could be a beautiful journey back to those feelings of creativity and the richness of vocabulary you miss. What do you think?

Yeah I guess.., I used to be someone so focused and creative. I don't know if I miss reading itself or who I was when I read though.

It sounds like you're reflecting deeply on how your habits have shaped you, and that's really brave and insightful. It’s common to miss parts of ourselves that we associate with certain activities, especially ones that brought us a lot of joy and growth. Reading might have been more than just an activity for you—it was a part of your identity and a way to connect with your inner self. Maybe exploring reading again could be a path to reconnecting with those parts of yourself you feel you've lost. It doesn't have to be an all-or-nothing approach. Even a small step, like exploring a short story or an article in a field you're curious about, could be a gentle way to reignite that spark. It’s about the journey of rediscovery, of both the joy of reading and the aspects of yourself you miss. What do you think about starting small and seeing where it takes you?

It's hard to imagine getting that same focus though. My brain feels wired and different now. In the past, I was able to immerse myself in the fictional worlds.

It’s perfectly natural to feel that way, especially in a world where our attention is constantly pulled in so many directions. The change in how you experience focus isn't a reflection of your ability to enjoy reading or dive into those immersive worlds again; it's more about the environment and habits we've all adapted to. Think of it as retraining a muscle. Just as athletes build up their strength and skills over time, you can gradually train your brain to rediscover that focus and immersion. Starting with shorter sessions and gradually increasing the time you spend reading might help ease you back into it. Also, allowing yourself to be fully present, maybe by minimizing distractions like turning off notifications on your phone, could help recreate that sense of immersion. Remember, it's okay for this process to take time. You're essentially reconnecting with a part of yourself, and that's a journey worth taking at your own pace. Maybe finding a quiet, comfortable spot and giving yourself permission to just be in the story, without pressure, could be a first step. How does that sound?

I get the muscle idea but I'm tied of treating everything as something I need to train or optimize. I just miss when it was effortless.

I completely understand where you're coming from. The pressure to constantly optimize and improve can be exhausting, and it's okay to yearn for the simplicity and joy of doing something just because it feels right, without any expectations or goals attached to it. Finding a way back to reading—or any beloved activity—doesn't have to be about rigorous schedules or forcing a habit. Instead, it can be about giving yourself permission to enjoy something for the pure pleasure it brings, even if it's just for a few moments. It's about recapturing that spontaneous joy you felt as a child or teen, when time seemed to stand still and you read simply because you loved it. Perhaps you could try revisiting a favorite book from those earlier days, no strings attached, no pressure to finish it in a certain time frame. Let it be a kind of time travel, a way to connect with the version of yourself who loved stories for their own sake. It's about allowing yourself to experience joy, wonder, and curiosity again, even if it's in small, infrequent doses. Would something like that feel more freeing to you?

Wait..I actually do love the idea of rereading something I loved before. That feels less intimidating. Maybe I'll see what changed and what didn't.

That sounds like a wonderful plan! Revisiting a beloved book can be like catching up with an old friend—familiar and comforting, yet with the potential to discover new things about both the book and yourself. It's a gentle way to rekindle your love for reading without the pressure of adapting to something new or challenging. You might find that your perspectives have changed, giving you fresh insights, or you might simply fall back in love with the story exactly as you remembered it. Either way, it's a beautiful step toward reconnecting with your passion for reading and, in a way, with yourself. Enjoy the journey back into those pages, and may it bring you the joy and peace you're looking for.

But what if it doesn't feel the same?

If it doesn't feel the same, that's completely okay too. Our connection to books can change as we grow and evolve. What moved us at one point in our lives might not resonate in the same way later on, and that's a natural part of the reading experience. It doesn't diminish the love you had for that story or the joy it once brought you; it simply means you're in a different place now. This could be an opportunity to explore what you're drawn to at this stage in your life. Your tastes may have shifted, and there could be whole new genres or authors out there waiting to capture your imagination in ways you haven't yet imagined. It's all part of your journey with reading and with yourself. Each book, whether it resonates as it once did or not, is a step on your path to discovering more about who you are and what speaks to you now. The beauty of reading is that there's always something new to discover, and sometimes, the journey can be even more rewarding when it takes an unexpected turn. So, try to approach this experience with curiosity and an open heart—whatever the outcome, it's a valuable step in your journey.